Perfection and Expectations ect...

Someone asked me a question the other day and my response got me thinking.  We all have such different experiences here in this life.

 I don't think it is fair to expect perfection of anyone including ourselves, but especially of someone else. President Uchtdorf gave an excellent talk at the General Relief Society Meeting a few weeks ago where he said, "God is fully aware that you and I are not perfect". He also said "God is fully aware that the people you think are perfect, are not!" Be patient with yourself, God is patient with you.

We often create expectations for ourselves that are impossible to meet. We compare our own weaknesses with our neighbor's strengths. That isn't fair! We never celebrate our good efforts because they seem to be less than what someone else does. That isn't fair either! This life is a journey not a short term goal!

I hope that my husband is working, that he is truly happy and that he is striving to do what he knows will make his Heavenly Father pleased. I need connection from him, but I have also realized lately that I can't rely on him for all of my connection either. He needs to connect with men and I need to connect with him, but I need to be connected with myself, my feelings, my own friends and my Heavenly Father too.

I feel like I "get" the SSA and the work that he needs to do. BUT I think that my understanding comes from doing my own work AND learning how to communicate with each other. My husband and I have a really good relationship but we are very open in our communication. I don't think any kind of relationship can work when you are not honest and open about your feelings.

I have plenty of friends in OSA marriages who have struggles. It is a universal truth. We are here on this earth to be tested and learn from our trials how to connect with and rely on God. I know that guys with SSA feel like they have the biggest trials, but I think that plenty of OSA guys would disagree. One of the things I love about SSA guys is the sensitivity! It is really attractive to women:) When you can find someone who you feel comfortable with and who "gets" you, there is nothing better in the world. But with that comes honesty and communication, did I mention COMMUNICATION? It is big :)

My goals in marriage are basic. Love, honesty, connection, and to be together forever. I told him that I signed up for forever, and I'm working hard to make sure I get there and I hope he is too, but I can't do his work for him (boy I wish some days I could), just like he can't do my work for me. The better we each are at our own work, the better we are together!!